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Sunday 19th February 2006
Destruction all around
[We cut into the buzzing arena, the fans cheer and talk amongst themselves in anticipation for the first pay-per-view of 2006. Suddenly, the lights drop in the arena as sirens light up the video wall. “Back By Popular Demand” comes on the screen in white writing as a bright light shines onto the stage as the Queen Bee herself is slowly comes up from underneath, stuck in a diva pose, the light makes her appear in a silhouette form.]
[After several seconds, the beat of the song begins to play as Lil’ Kim struts forward wearing knee-high leather boots, a denim mini-skirt and a white top which shows off her larger than life cleavage. She brings the microphone to her lips and pumps up the crowd, rapping to the NP3 anthem “How Many Licks?”.]
I've been a lot of places, seen a lot of faces
[As the chorus rolls around, Lil’ Kim dances on the stage, making her boobs bounce as she makes faces to the song and the sounds of Sisqo come over the PA system. She walks to the edge of the stage and waves to the crowd who wave back, she flips her hair from side to side, pointing at the audience.]
So, how many licks does it take till you get to the center of the?
[Kim then begins to strut down the ramp on her way to the ring, with the microphone pressed to her lips, she smiles to the audience as she walks past them. She grinds up and down against the ring apron and giggles.]
This verse goes out to my niggaz in jail
[As the chorus comes around, Lil’ Kim heads up the steel steps and climbs into the ring. The diamonds draped around her neck shimmer in the light as she grinds to her song, running her hands over her body.]
How many licks does it take till you get to the center of the?
[The lights change to a silver strop light as Lil’ Kim heads to all four turnbuckles and climbs up onto them, hyping up the crowd. We see Leah dancing Mr. Snuggles on the announcer’s table as Lil’ Kim pouts and gives the microphone all of her attitude.]
If you drivin in the street, hold on to your seat
[The Queen Bee hops down from the turnbuckles and dances in the middle of the ring, shaking her boobs to the camera and laughing to herself as she sings the chorus. She rolls her hips to the song and grabs her crotch area.]
How many licks does it take till you get to the center of the?
[As the song ends, Lil’ Kim raises her arm up into the air as a line of sparks fly up into the air behind her. A missile sound is heard as an orange pyro shoots towards the stage and explodes in a sea of colours, lighting up the stage. Lil’ Kim then takes a bow and blows kisses to the fans.]
[The cameraman then pans around the cheering crowd, capturing some of the best signs in the audience to broadcast to a global audience. The German audience stand on their feet and applaud the opening of the pay-per-view. “Marry Me, Tracee!”, “Mr. Snuggles is the true sex kitten!”, “Chimera Needs A Tan!” and “Barbara is the true legend!” are amongst those in the audience. We cut to ringside to see Leah and JLT smiling, and the NP3 mascot Mr. Snuggles sit on the desk, licking his paws. JLT is wearing a red dress with a diamond necklace as Leah has a black Versace top and jeans on, with nice make-up.]
JLT: Hello everybody! Welcome to Nuclear Pussy III! It's the first pay-per-view of 2006 and boy do we have a show for you tonight! We're coming to live from the capital of Germany, Berlin and the crowd are just electric here tonight! I'm JLT and I'm joined as always by Leah and our mascot for this huge event, Mr. Snuggles!
Leah: That's right, Mr. Snuggles get recognition! It's wonderful to be here tonight but sadly, this is the last show with Mr. Snuggles!
JLT: Well I can't say I'll miss him, my arm is covered in scratch marks! Anyway, we have a huge main event for you to tonight featuring Icenique putting her Unleashed Championship on the line against Mystika, and guess what, Amaryllis Vasquez is the special guest referee! I don't think 'Mari' is going to call it down the middle, however Mystika wants to get her hands on that belt and I'm sure that she'll stop at nothing to get it!
Leah: It should be an excellent match! We've also got the pale-as-hell Chimera challenging for Katia's Rockford State Championship in a "Mystery Box" ladder match! I'm so excited for that, there's an element of death about it, it's a chance for us to kill one of them! I don't mind which, they're both so annoying!
JLT: That's not very nice. I am looking forward to seeing "Beauty and the Best Part II" later! We're going to crown the brand new DU Tag Team Champions as three teams fight it out in the centre of the ring for the coveted belts! Bloo and Jinx, Blonde Ambition and the Occult could all leave here with the belts firmly strapped around their waists! There's no clear favourites for the match either so it should be very exciting to watch!
Leah: There's nothing better than tossing a bunch of freaks in the ring and watching them get it on! In a wrestling sense, none of that lesbian bullshit. The very annoying Sexy Amanda continues to try and prove herself tonight and she takes on British legend Dame Barbara in singles action! That should be an awesome match to watch, there's nothing like a dinosaur and a huge-egoed bitch tearing up the ring!
JLT: That should be an excellent match too, and let's not forget our opening bout tonight as we see Aphrodite and Tracee, the weird 'friendship' taking on the even weirder Sisters of Morrigan! Aphrodite requested this match after she was attacked by Tracee, for some reason I don't think they're going to make the best team! Especially after Aphrodite's perfume brought out Tracee in hives!
Leah: Well Tracee shouldn't have sensitive skin, honestly, some people are so inconsiderate!
JLT: We've also got Lil' Kim on hand to present the Diva of the Month award and our show promises to be spectacular!
Leah: Oh! All you know for all you fans out there, I do have MySpace, so add me! I have like 2 friends, and one of them is that annoying Forbidden girl who requires an avalanche of makeup to look attractive!
JLT: Leah, don't plug yourself on our shows!
Leah: You have to get the message out there Jamie, although there are some freaks on MySpace, anyway, Mr. Snuggles is going to be here all night! Isn't he just adorable?
JLT: He's very adorable, except that he continues to scratch me, hiss at the managers and meows through all of the backstage segments, he's very distracting!
Leah: Jamie! Don't be so racist!
JLT: I wasn't?!
Leah: Of course you weren't!
Tag Team Match
JLT: Our first match of the show is Aphrodite teaming with newcomer Tracee Nguyen to take on the mean machines the Sisters of Morrigan! This should be an interesting match, especially since Aphrodite and Tracee don’t get on. Aphrodite was even attacked by Tracee two weeks ago!
Leah: Yeah, that’s why it’s in the bag for Neman and Macha. I put a hefty bet on them winning tonight, Tracee will have to trust the French model as her partner tonight if they have any chances of winning!
JLT: Indeed she does!
[As the fans cheer on for the action, A sudden music blasts throughout the place, "Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls plays as the blonde vixen Aphrodite with the goddess name steps out of the curtains sporting as usual one of her many pink attires, She stands in the stage and begins to pose for the fans who cannot help but love her ditzy attitude. After all the posing she starts to make her way to the ring while shaking some of the fans hands along the way. When she reaches the ring she walks over to the steel steps and then enters the ring using the middle ropes giving a good view of her backside to the male fans, Once inside the ring she walks over to the middle of the ring where she conducts are very sexy dance for the audience before her opponent makes her way.]
John Roe: The following contest is a tag team match scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Paris, France; at a weight of 125lbs...APHRODITE!!!
[The scene goes pitch black. Seconds later, pyros go off right when "New Disease" by Spineshank hits. Tracee is standing in the middle at the top of the ramp. She makes her way down towards the ring running, slides in and stands atop on each turnbuckle.]
John Roe: Her partner, from Texas, at a weight of 125lbs, accompanied to the ring by Deanna Nguyen...TRACEE NGUYEN!!!
[A flash of lightning strikes the ramp way, followed by a huge bloom of pyrotechnic smoke. From the mist appears The Shroud of Darkness with Belatucardos the Master leading the way. At ringside The Masters stops and the Sisters Of Morrigan Macha and Neman enter the ring, sliding under the bottom rope.]
John Roe: Their opponents, from Parts Unknown, to be accompanied to the ring by The Master, Neman and Macha...THE SISTERS OF MORRIGAN!!!
[The Sisters of Morrigan discuss who’s going to start the match, as the referee signals for the bell. Tracee demands that she start and forces Aphrodite onto the apron. Neman and Tracee decide to start the match off. Aphrodite and Macha cheer from their respective corners, as Neman and Tracee advance on each other. The two lock up and Tracee ends up pushing Neman back into a corner. The referee gets in between them, making them break the hold on each other. Then, Tracee slaps Neman hard across the face. Neman tries to get out of the corner, as she holds her face, but Tracee keeps her there, laying some chops across her chest.]
[Tracee grabs Neman and whips her into the other corner. She follows through, hitting Neman with a clothesline and then grabbing her and nailing her with a bulldog. Tracee gets up, stomping on her a few times. Then, she drags her over to her corner, tagging Aphrodite in by slapping her in the chest. She gets in the ring and they both grab Neman, bouncing her off the ropes, hitting her with a double clothesline. Tracee gets back to her corner as Aphrodite picks Neman up. Aphrodite then under hooks both of Neman arms and nails her with a standing tornado DDT. She goes for the pin.]
JLT: Here we go!
[1]
[2]
[Aphrodite argues with the ref, stepping over Neman. Neman takes this opportunity and rolls Aphrodite up into a school boy. She only gets a two count as well. Aphrodite quickly gets up form it and starts to stomp Neman, rather mad that she tried for a pin. Aphrodite brings Neman up to her feet and whips her into the corner. Aphrodite then adjusts her hair, running her hands through it and making sure it’s in place. Neman steps out of the corner, holding her back, only to have Aphrodite knock her down with a running calf kick. Aphrodite tries for another pin.]
[1]
[2]
[Aphrodite argues with the ref again, and Neman takes this opportunity to starts to crawl over to Macha. Macha reaches out for the tag, but Aphrodite grabs Neman, before she can get any further. Aphrodite picks Neman up and whips her off the ropes. Aphrodite goes for a back body drop, but instead Neman kicks her in the face. Then, Neman picks her up into a scoop slam position, drops her down onto her feet and slams Aphrodite down with a spinning DDT.]
JLT: BMacha hasn’t been involved in this match yet, she’s the freshest while Tracee and Aphrodite have strategically teamed up. That’s very surprising seeing as they are a mis-matched team.
Leah: Well, it is tag team wrestling.
[Both woman start to crawl to their respective corners. The fans get behind each wrestler, but Aphrodite gets to Tracee first, tagging her in. Neman ends up jumping for the tag and gets it, bringing Macha into the ring. Macha climbs into the ring, much to Tracee’s delight. Tracee charges at Macha, but Macha knocks her down with an elbow to the face. Aphrodite tries the same thing but gets knocked down with a clothesline. Tracee gets back up and tries to punch Macha, but Macha catches it and slams her down to the mat with a snap suplex.]
[Then, Macha gets back up, bounces off the ropes and nails Tracee with a running senton. Macha goes for the pin, but Aphrodite breaks it up. Aphrodite picks Macha up, by her hair and tosses her, slamming her down onto the mat, using only Macha’s hair. Aphrodite wipes a few strands of hair off her hands. The ref tries to get Aphrodite back to her corner, but all that happens is Neman nails Tracee from behind, knocking her out of the ring. Neman waits for Aphrodite to get up and then vaults herself over the top rope, hitting Tracee with a body press.]
[Back in the ring, Macha waits for Tracee to get back up . When she does, Macha runs into Tracee’s path and nails her with a big boot. Macha goes for a pin and only gets a two count. Macha brings Tracee to her feet and whips her into the corner. Macha goes to follow through with a clothesline, but Tracee grabs the ref and puts him in the corner and Macha connects to him with a thundering splash. Macha backs off as Tracee gets behind her. Macha turns around as Tracee goes for a superkick. Macha ducks and the referee gets nailed with it.]
JLT: I don’t know how these referees always manage to get themselves in danger, we need to have them wear a suit of armor.
Leah: Mr. Snuggles is manlier than they are.
[Macha moves behind Tracee, but Aphrodite nails Macha from behind, sending her to the mat. Then Neman gets back into the ring and tries to hit Tracee with a clothesline. Tracee ducks it and Aphrodite hits Neman with a jumping calf kick.
[Macha waits for Aphrodite to get back up and then clotheslines her over the top rope, both of them going to the outside. Back in the ring, Neman has gone to the top rope, Tracee laid out on the mat. Neman signals to the crowd and performs the a spinning dragon splash. Tracee moves out of the way though, sending Neman right into the mat. The referee now starts to regain his composure, getting up out of the corner. Tracee goes for the pin, but the ref has no idea its going on, as he tries to recover from the superkick.]
[Tracee gets off of Neman, complaining to the ref. Macha gets back in the ring, waiting for Tracee to turn around. When she does, Macha attempts to hit her with a powerbomb but Tracee pushes out and kicks Macha, she then pulls Macha into the “South Texas Deathride” widow’s peak finisher. Tracee then covers as the referee begins to count.]
[1]
[2]
[3]
John Roe: The winners of this match…APHRODITE & TRACEE NGUYEN!!!
[Deanna Nguyen applauds on the outside of the ring as Tracee raises her arms in victory, Aphrodite gets to her feet and nods towards Tracee who gives her a dirty look. Aphrodite then leaves the ring with a smug look on her face, Tracee rolls to the outside and hugs Deanna as the two begin to head backstage.]
[The Master enters the ring and picks up his two clients, Macha and Neman both hold their heads in shame. Suddenly from behind comes a mysterious attacker as the Sisters of Morrigan fall forward. The Master then swings with a clothesline attempted at the mysterious woman but she lifts the 7 footer into a spinebuster slam.]
JLT: Who is that?!
Leah: Isn’t she that new chick from Hardkore Nippon? I heard she’s accomplished in Japan!
JLT: Keiko Nakamura! That’s her!
[Neman tries to attack Keiko from behind but she nails a powerslam countering the move. Keiko then slides out of the ring and grabs a trash can and tosses it into the ring. She leaps onto the apron and leans back on the ropes, thrusting herself in and connects with a missile dropkick to Macha, sending her into the middle rope. Keiko then picks up the trash can and places it over Macha’s head. Keiko then signals to the crowd before nailing a spinning dropkick to the trash can, sending Macha tumbling out of the ring.]
[Neman has found her feet along with the Master, Neman goes to attack Keiko but The Master pulls her away and out of the ring as the Sisters of Morrigan leave the ring. Keiko then stands on the top turnbuckle and looks around at the crowd, she stares down the Sisters of Morrigan as they head up the ramp.]
JLT: It looks like Keiko has made quite an impact here tonight! Why did she attack the Morrigan Sisters?
Leah: Beats me. Keiko looks like a bundle of fun.
[We find Shane and Tequila walking backstage heading towards Shane's office. The couple have arrived at the arena, Tequila is wearing Shane’s blazer around her to protect herself from the cold and is dressed in a leather mini-skirt. Shane is looking smart for the huge opening event of the year, with a white shirt and black trousers.]
Shane Rockford: I’m so excited for this event. We have a whole host of matches tonight. I’m really looking forward to the main event Unleashed title match. People will be tuning in from all over the global to see that match.
Tequila: Well, wait to see what I’m wearing during the Tag Team Championship match. You’ll be blown away.
Shane Rockford: Speaking of which, wait until you see the fresh fruit I’ve had laid on in our office.
Tequila: Ooh, I love fruit. It’s so exotic.
[Upon reaching the office Shane opens the door and the
couple step in to find Suzie Woods sitting quite
comfortably in Shane's chair with her feet up on the
desk. She’s eating a piece of melon and raises her eyebrows at DU’s elite power couple.]
Suzie Woods: Tch if it isn't DU's favourite couple, you two
certainly took your time getting here! what do you
want?
[Shane frowns and looks at Tequila who scowls at Suzie. Shane then shakes his head and addresses the woman sitting in his comfy leather chair. Tequila looks around at the trashed office, the fresh fruit table pushed over and bowls breaking, as well as a portrait of Tequila smashed on the floor.]
Shane Rockford: I’m sorry, what are you doing here?
Tequila: Are you Michelle Rodriguez? I heard you’ve gone to shit. You used to be a hot piece of ass. Anyway, yeah! What are you doing here, Michelle?
Suzie Woods: Hey! You two called me remember?!
Shane Rockford: Suzie, I said to meet me at our headquarters in Las Vegas not here. I have business to attend to tonight, I can’t be dealing with you.
Tequila: So, she’s not Michelle Rodriguez?
Shane Rockford: No, she’s a new signing, Teq. She tried to make an impact last week by playing the rebel and now look at her, she’s really pathetic. She’s trying to provoke me. I was supposed to meet her to discuss her debut match and her first opponent.
Suzie Woods: Yeah whatever, I'll take whoever you have to
throw at me.
Shane Rockford: Well, I don’t have time to discuss you right now. I have better things to do. Can you get the hell out of my office?
[Suzie moves her feet but makes a point to knock a
glass ornament off the desk. It hits the floor and Tequila gasps, she looks at Suzie with a face full of anger.]
Tequila: You bitch!
[Suzie walks past the broken ornament, looks down at
all the pieces and shrugs before storming out of the
office. Tequila then looks with her mouth gaping at Shane who shakes her head.]
Shane Rockford: I can just tell she’s going to be a pain my ass.
Tequila: You know the damage she just caused is coming out of her pay-check, right?
[Tequila shakes her head and approaches her broken portrait. She lifts it up as the glass slides off it. She gives an annoyed expression to Shane who approaches his desk, and brushes the shoe marks off of the polished wood.]
JLT: Wow, it looks like Suzie Woods is intent on getting the attention of Divas Unleashed’s power couple. I wouldn’t dream of trashing the president’s office like that!
Leah: That’s because you’re a wimp. I like this, Suzie’s going to pay now. How fun. I love nothing better than two people fighting, especially if someone gets an ass-whipping, in a non-S&M way of course.
[We cut backstage to see Katia walking, she has a huge necklace as various men behind her carry her luggage into the arena. The Fabulous One has a long, diamond-studded silver evening gown and is drenched in diamonds from her upcoming jewelry line. Livia is at her side as makes small talk with her friend and client.]
[A fan is walking backstage, looking at pictures on his digital camera. Katia notices this and pushes Livia away, she stands in front of the fan and smiles, she puts her hands on her hips and pouts for the fan to take a picture of her. He looks up at her and frowns and walks past. Katia’s face drops as she shakes her head. Livia rejoins her.]
Katia: Germans are so rude.
[Katia continues to walk when she’s suddenly ambushed by journalist Krysta Taylor and camera crew. Katia smiles at the new attention as Krysta Taylor stands in front of the camera and undoes her top to reveal her enlarged breasts, Katia glances at her as Krysta smiles.]
Krysta Taylor: Katia! How are you feeling tonight going in to such a big match?
Katia: I’m confident as always. I’m going to come out tonight victorious, I am the Fabulous One after all. Chimera is a freak, she has no business in the ring with greatness such as myself.
Krysta Taylor: Whatever. Now, with the added stipulation of the mystery boxes, do you think that the mystery aspect will be a factor in who wins tonight?
Katia: I’m going to win, Krysta. I love getting presents so the match will be very fun for me, and my fans buy my presents all the time, I mean sense I step foot in this arena I’ve just been mobbed with photographers and admirers. It’s hard being as fabulous as I am.
Krysta Taylor: If you don’t win, what will your future plans be? The Stripped title? What?
Katia: Let’s get one thing clear because you obviously have too much wax in your ears to hear me correctly. I’m not going to lose. If I was going to lose then I have a number of opportunities to pursue, for instance, my jewelry line is coming out and you know, there’s more money in the “Treasures of Alexandria” than you will ever make.
Krysta Taylor: You slut. Thanks for the insult, I mean, interview.
Katia: Oh you’re welcome. I know that I keep the little people like you in business.
[Katia smiles at Krysta who fake smiles back to her to look good for the camera, Krysta then rolls her eyes. Livia then pulls Katia away as they begin to walk to their locker room, in the background we see Krysta holding up her middle finger to the Rockford State Champion. Katia talks in a flat tone.]
Katia: I swear I’m going to have that woman fired.
[We cut into the parking lot to see Sexy Amanda walking with a baseball bat in her hand. She’s dressed in her ring attire as Shayla Walker is chasing after her, yelling her to stop it. Shayla catches up to Amanda but Amanda nails her with the end of the baseball bat, sending her to the concrete floor. Amanda then approaches Barbara’s ‘Union Jack’ bus and smiles.]
Sexy Amanda: Barbara, this is what you get when you mess with me. Maybe this will teach you and the management to listen to my demands.
[Amanda then swings with her baseball bat and connects with the bus’ windscreen, making a huge dent in it. Amanda laughs and continues to swing, shattering the glass as the car alarm sounds. Amanda then begins to swing her bat into the side of the bus, denting the side and denting the huge portrait of Dame Barbara on the side. Amanda then smiles as she sees the damage she’s caused and spits onto the slogan “British Living Legend”.]
Sexy Amanda: Now to Shane’s car.
[Amanda spots an expensive Rolls Royce parked neatly. Amanda approaches it and peers in, she sees the leather interior, the expensive seats and a bottle of champagne opened with two glasses resting on a table on the inside. Amanda then nods to herself and smiles.]
Sexy Amanda: You should really listen to me Shane. I know you want to hold me back, you’re scared of my talent, maybe this will help you think otherwise.
[Amanda then picks up her baseball bat and slams it through the window. She then takes it to the side of the car, trying to dent the hearse-like car and begins to kick at it too. Amanda then stands on the bonnet of the car and slams the baseball bat through the windshield, releasing it and standing with a look of satisfaction on her face.]
[Amanda then hops down as Holly Wentz walks out of the arena with hot coffee in her hands. Holly stops in her tracks as she sees the damage of the cars, Amanda approaches with a smug look on her face. Holly then turns to her.]
Sexy Amanda: Yeah, I just destroyed Barbara’s and Shane Rockford’s car. It’s pretty neat huh? You think they’ll recognise me now they know what I’m capable of?
Holly Wentz: Sure? Bu-
Sexy Amanda: You’re like a personal assistant to Shane right? You should tell him to come and see the damage and watch me beat Barbara next. Then he’ll know who should be getting the Unleashed title shot instead of Mystika.
Holly Wentz: Okay. Except-
Sexy Amanda: Except what?
Holly Wentz: That’s not Shane’s car. His car is over there.
[Holly points over to a limousine with two DU flag logos on the top. Amanda raises her eyebrows and frowns. She turns to Holly.]
Sexy Amanda: Actually, that does look like his car. If I didn’t destroy his car, then who’s was it?
Holly Wentz: That Rolls Royce belongs to Lilith…
[Amanda looks shocked as she turns and looks at the damage she’s caused. She turns back to Holly with a scared look on her face as Holly begins to giggle. Amanda brushes past her and heads backstage for her match as Holly continues to walk but accidentally trips on a pot hole in the parking lot and falls forward, the coffee erupting in her face.]
JLT: It looks like Sexy Amanda was trying to send a message to our president but it looks like it backfired.
Leah: Amanda is just dumb. I hope Lilith humps her as punishment.
Standard Match
JLT: Let's get this match started. We have Dame Barbara who is a legend in this country taking on the disrespectful Sexy Amanda.
Leah: With the way she's been acting lately, they really should have gone with Vicious Amanda. But once the t-shirts are printed, you know, what's done is done.
[“My Sacrifice” by Creed hits the PA system as Barbara is escorted to the ring by phenomenal her wrestling mother-in-law, the 81 year old ‘Ma‘ Tabitha Windsor. She comes out wearing a sequined white and gold robe with Dame across the back, stands at the entrance way, looks around the arena. Then Ma Tabitha raises her hand as golden rain falls from above. She saunters to the ring and climbs through the second rope.]
John Roe: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, introducing first, from Workington, Cumbria, England; to be accompanied to the ring by Shayla Walker, the British legend...DAME BARBARA!!!
[The lights dim and "Too Cold" by Vanilla Ice plays as Amanda walks down to the ring seductively to blue strobe lights flashing all over the arena. Amanda climbs into the ring and stares at Barbara.]
John Roe: Her opponent, from Akron, Ohio; at a weight of 120lbs...SEXY AMANDA!!!
JLT: Refereeing our match tonight is another German legend, Hans Schmutzhausen, as Amanda didn't trust our referees to call a fair match. You see him there getting his picture taken with Dame Barbara.
Leah: Let's keep this show moving, we're late as it is!
JLT: Sounds about right. Referee Hans Schmutzhausen signals for the bell and we are under way!
[The Berlin crowd honks their airhorns "*honk-honk-honk* BAR-BA-RA!! honk-honk-honk* BAR-BA-RA!! honk-honk-honk* BAR-BA-RA!! honk-honk-honk* BAR-BA-RA!! honk-honk-honk* BAR-BA-RA!!" Dame Barbara and Sexy Amanda lock up. And Dame Barbara tosses her to the mat! The audience applauds the show of power]
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